The LED Spirit of X-mas
Posted on December 13, 2008
Filed Under christmas, holiday fun, homeownership | 9 Comments
I have reconsidered. After writing Tuesday’s harangue, I tried to settle into my own bah humbug and felt all kinds of itchy and sad. It occurred to me that without my driving the Christmas Bus, the holiday would, in fact, actually not occur for my children. No filled stockings, no gifts beneath the tree. Hell, no tree at all. No Christmas cookies, no gingerbread house, no cards sent to friends and family. No English trifle and tenderloin and no reading of the Night Before Christmas and The Grinch and The Steadfast Tin Soldier.
I was cynically sipping a little alcoholic grog and watching Comedy Central in my bathrobe, when it hit me…I AM the spirit of Christmas, at least in this household. So I put down the beverage (which really wasn’t a good idea at 11 a.m. anyway) and changed out of my pajamas, but did not remove my Ugg slippers (they do have rubber soles for outdoor use, ya know) and climbed into the SUV that was fairly humming with anticipation in the driveway, keen to its task of wheeling down the interstate to Target, AGAIN, in less than 24 hours since its last visit to the Big Box. (It’s possible that the hum I speak of is an indicator of something altogether more SINISTER ticking like a time bomb in the engine and has associations with the four or five dashboard lights that are now constantly illuminated warning me of airbag failures and low tire pressure and potential explosions, but I’ve decided to just ignore all that until I get this Christmas thing worked out.)
So me in my Ugg slippers and my ailing Honda Pilot made it back to Target to wander the aisles looking for the perfect display of Christmas cheer and, ultimately, I got me some of those white, dangling, light-up stars to hang from the porch that faces the street.
They were easy to assemble. They are big enough to be seen from the street through the tangle of woods in front of our house. And they really are lovely. All white and festive and pure. But now I can see how the Christmas light thing really snow balls. Every time I drive up to the house I think, “Oh, Cute Lights, but wouldn’t it be cuter if there was another four or five or fifteen strands of white Christmas stars hanging from the second story roof line and wound round the front columns and maybe at the back door too.” One measly strand of stars just doesn’t seem enough, feels kind of miserly and half-baked and now I’m afraid I’m going to have to spend the weekend wrapping the house in twinkly lights just to give those stars some company because my star strand, as seen from the street, while quietly beautiful, is kind of making me feel lonely and sad all over again.
No Ugg slippers this time…it’s work boots, and gloves and staple guns and extension cords. I’m in need of a light extravaganza, some riotous blaze of holiday magic. Here’s hoping they’re having a sale. Here’s hoping I don’t fall off a ladder and break a vertebrae in pursuit of more LED administered holiday cheer.
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